I could not reconcile these: a very insecure child who kept most of her feelings to herself and a grown up who shared many of her painful childhood experiences. Kathleen Bautista shows both in her e-book “Healing and Happiness for Wounded Children”.
I cried several times as I read the book. Why am I still crying while writing this (more of a reaction)? Maybe because all of us (whatever the family background) are wounded in some ways – and all of us want to claim “healing” and “happiness” so we can enjoy life despite the imperfections while we strive to achieve what God created us for. Now, I understand. You have to make people SEE what you went through and how you managed to rise from this painful situation… because only then can you truly convince them that healing is possible and that happiness is a choice!
I am sure that the author will inspire countless individuals, especially children who come from broken homes, and married couples who think that separation is the only option – through this powerful book!
This is a call for responsible and ethical stories on suicide.
What do most reports on suicide contain? Do they help prevent more suicides? Do they give hope and healthy options to heavily confused and depressed individuals? Do they include help lines?
I have other important concerns:
- Why report the specific method used by the victim when it produces a copycat effect?
- Why state a cause as if it were a fact when nobody knows all the circumstances behind a person’s decision to end his life? Besides, even suicide notes can be easily fabricated.
- Unless committed in a public place, you know that a person wanted it to remain private. Why publish a report when it does nothing to give hope to the hopeless?
- The effect of suicide on relatives is beyond comprehension. Why aggravate the situation by mentioning the complete names of victims?
I think the above-mentioned concerns are enough to urge media groups to adhere to a set of guidelines for responsible reporting on suicide!
Kung may kapansanan ka, pero di kaya ng katawan mo ang saklay, at wala ka ring pambili ng wheelchair, papasok ka pa ba sa eskwelahan?
Rommel Arellano, winner of this year’s search for “Happiest Pinoy”, did!
GUMAPANG siya, makapag-aral lang mula elementary hanggang college. Literal na gumapang, ha… ‘yung may tsinelas sa dalawang kamay, umula’t umaraw! KAYA MO ‘YON?
Sa radio interview nila Karen Davila at Vic Lima ng Pasada 630 sa DZMM noong Lunes, marami ang na-touch. Palagay ko, marami din ang nagalit. Gumapang si Rommel sa una niyang job interview (office staff sa isang kumpanyang nagbebenta ng motorsiklo). Nag-effort siya para maabot ang door knob at mabuksan ang pinto. Nakatingin daw sa taas ang interviewer pagbukas ng pinto. Andun si Rommel sa baba, sa sahig. Alam mo ba kung ano ang nag-iisang tanong kay Rommel pagtingin sa resume niya? Eto: “Marunong ka bang mag-drive ng motor?”
Kahit na sobrang nainsulto at nasaktan, maayos siyang nagpaalam at nagpasalamat sa oras ng interviewer. Pinilit ni Rommel na tumayo sa harap niya. Sa tingin ko, symbolic iyon, dahil lalong nag-ibayo ang desire ni Rommel na may mapatunayan sa buhay. “Di niya type ang magpa-cry-cry” (sabi sa kanta). Pinili niya ang magpatuloy, sabay sabi sa sariling: “One day, we will meet again, and you will see the man you have rejected”.
Pati si Karen Davila, nagtaka. Paano daw nangyaring ni wala man lang bitterness o galit sa katawan niya? Sabi ni Rommel, “Tinanggap ko po ang kalagayan ko. Wala po akong magagawa sa pangungutya ng ibang tao, pero I can change myself”. Ang prayer niya? “Even if I am different in their eyes, let me just make a difference in their lives”.
Paanong nangyaring kapakanan pa rin ng iba ang naisip niya? Paano ring nangyari na ang isang taong may kapansanan pa ang ngayo’y umaakay sa mga kababayan niya sa tamang landasin sa buhay bilang isang counsellor?
Ganyan ang nagagawa ng tamang mind-set, tamang pagkilos, at tamang pananampalataya sa Dios.
Sabi ni Oscar Wilde, “We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars”.
Ikaw, anong hamon ang pwede mong malampasan sa kabila ng kapansanan o kakulangan – sa pamamagitan ng tamang mind-set, tamang pagkilos, at tamang pananampalataya sa Dios?
*Ang “Happiest Pinoy” ay isang nationwide search ng Cebuana Lhuillier Insurance Solutions.
If your gift is encouraging others, be encouraging.
- Romans 12:8
So encourage each other, and build each other up….
- 1 Thessalonians 5:11
Guard your heart above all else for it determines the course of your life.
- Proverbs 4:23
“For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope”.
…Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.
- Ephesians 4:29
Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works.
- Hebrews 10:24
Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, Copyright 1996, 2004 by Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.
The mere fact that we are still alive is an indication that we still have a mission. God made us for a purpose. Everything we enjoy – our strength, talents, and skills – all these gifts were given to be used, that God may be glorified through us. But how can this purpose be fulfilled if we fail to cope: if we can not unleash our full potential because we are fed up?
WHAT’S OUR SHIELD?
Nobody becomes fed up or severely discouraged in an instant, in the same way that nobody becomes fired up in a wink of an eye! The point is, feelings of hopelessness can be prevented. We should not wait until we or someone we care about is on the verge of despair. Life is too precious to be wasted.
There are masks for pollution; alcohol and vaccines for germs and diseases; values, strategies, and verses for temptations; CCTV and an arsenal of tactics for enemies. What’s our shield from the paralyzing and damaging effects of the inability to cope with life’s realities?
Hope boosters will help you cope with challenges. They will not wipe away your problems and your tears, but they will make life more bearable despite the sadness and heartaches. If the principles and tips are seriously and consistently applied, these are effective in finding “endless hope”, instead of a “hopeless end”.
There is no single idea or strategy that can drive away our sadness, worries, and fears. We need to constantly depend on various hope boosters, because the enemy repeatedly tweets a negative message – especially when we are not on guard.
HOPE BOOSTERS SEMINAR
How many people turn to negative things – alcohol, drugs, gambling, and even wrong relationships – when repeatedly faced with stressors?
While other individuals do not seem to have any vices, or obviously unpleasant choices, they have simply given up on learning, growing, and sharing their talents to contribute in nation-building. Indeed, people can not give what they do not have. Thus, I am reaching out to both young and mature people through “Hope Boosters”, a seminar to help them find encouragement amidst different pressures.
Attending this seminar will help participants:
(1.) Learn effective hope boosters or coping strategies;
(2.) Get inspiration from the stories of people who went through challenges and fought their way to success; and
(3.) Evaluate their strengths and weaknesses, in order to become better citizens and leaders.
Nobody is spared from different kinds of challenges and disasters whether natural, emotional or financial, but you can make life more bearable! You need a pro-active and reflective stance against persistent feelings of loneliness.
Young or old, we face endless stressors, so we all need hope boosters, not just to cope, but also to get fired up, not fed up!
Copyright 2012 by Marilyn C. Arayata. All rights reserved. No part of this work may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, broadcast, or transmitted in any form, or by any means, without the prior written permission of the copyright owner.